1 00:00:06,666 --> 00:00:08,200 - Hi! I'm Patrick Star! 2 00:00:08,267 --> 00:00:11,303 And I live with my parents! 3 00:00:11,370 --> 00:00:12,171 Ow! 4 00:00:12,238 --> 00:00:13,873 This is my dad. 5 00:00:13,940 --> 00:00:16,142 [zany music] 6 00:00:16,208 --> 00:00:18,878 This is my mom. [laughs] 7 00:00:18,945 --> 00:00:21,981 This is my sister. She's shy. 8 00:00:22,048 --> 00:00:24,350 This is my grandpa. 9 00:00:24,416 --> 00:00:27,119 This is my room! 10 00:00:27,186 --> 00:00:28,120 And this... 11 00:00:28,187 --> 00:00:30,089 * * 12 00:00:30,156 --> 00:00:33,492 This is my show! 13 00:00:33,559 --> 00:00:35,427 * * 14 00:00:36,863 --> 00:00:39,065 [upbeat music] 15 00:00:39,131 --> 00:00:40,432 - Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 16 00:00:40,499 --> 00:00:41,433 Oh, boy. 17 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,235 Oh, boy. 18 00:00:43,302 --> 00:00:46,739 [giggles] Hey, I lose my turn. 19 00:00:46,806 --> 00:00:49,341 - Hooray. - Whoa. 20 00:00:49,408 --> 00:00:50,877 - Yes. 21 00:00:50,943 --> 00:00:52,812 - Aw, barnacles. 22 00:00:52,879 --> 00:00:55,247 Move three spaces ahead. 23 00:00:55,314 --> 00:00:57,616 I never lose my turn. 24 00:00:57,684 --> 00:00:58,951 - Aw. 25 00:00:59,018 --> 00:01:01,053 look at the bright side, Squidina. 26 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:04,156 At least it's not raining. 27 00:01:04,223 --> 00:01:06,959 [thunder booming] 28 00:01:07,026 --> 00:01:08,861 [gasps] A bat! 29 00:01:08,928 --> 00:01:10,730 [together] A bat! 30 00:01:10,797 --> 00:01:12,865 - Oh, calm down, everybody. 31 00:01:12,932 --> 00:01:14,600 You know what they say. 32 00:01:14,667 --> 00:01:19,972 See a bat, kiss it twice, always gets rid of head lice. 33 00:01:20,039 --> 00:01:23,242 - Ugh. I hate poetry. 34 00:01:23,309 --> 00:01:27,914 - I'll handle this. 35 00:01:27,980 --> 00:01:28,948 Hey. 36 00:01:29,015 --> 00:01:31,017 [all screaming] 37 00:01:31,083 --> 00:01:34,954 - Get back. 38 00:01:35,021 --> 00:01:37,423 - [gags] 39 00:01:37,489 --> 00:01:39,358 - A scroll? 40 00:01:39,425 --> 00:01:43,863 It says, "Agnes Steelhead is coming to visit." 41 00:01:43,930 --> 00:01:45,464 Who's Agnes Steelhead? 42 00:01:45,531 --> 00:01:48,735 - My mother and your grandmother. 43 00:01:48,801 --> 00:01:51,704 [gasps] Oh, but this house is a mess. 44 00:01:51,771 --> 00:01:53,505 Oh, dear. 45 00:01:53,572 --> 00:01:56,075 - Achoo! 46 00:01:56,142 --> 00:01:58,477 - What's Grandma Steelhead like? 47 00:01:58,544 --> 00:02:01,480 - Well, she's really good at criticism. 48 00:02:01,547 --> 00:02:05,051 - She always brought me weird gifts. 49 00:02:06,719 --> 00:02:10,189 - Your grandma is a real live Klopnadian witch. 50 00:02:10,256 --> 00:02:12,725 But I don't think she likes me very much. 51 00:02:12,792 --> 00:02:14,226 "I'm Agnes. 52 00:02:14,293 --> 00:02:17,363 "I've got magical powers of transformation, 53 00:02:17,429 --> 00:02:21,433 and I don't approve of this non-magical husband." 54 00:02:21,500 --> 00:02:22,434 Agnes! 55 00:02:22,501 --> 00:02:23,469 - Mom. 56 00:02:23,535 --> 00:02:24,636 - Grandma. 57 00:02:24,703 --> 00:02:28,908 - Oh, where are my darling ladies? 58 00:02:28,975 --> 00:02:31,643 And Patrick, was it? 59 00:02:31,710 --> 00:02:32,745 - Grandma! 60 00:02:32,812 --> 00:02:33,780 - Ugh. 61 00:02:33,846 --> 00:02:35,114 Hello, Cereal. 62 00:02:35,181 --> 00:02:36,682 - Cecil. - See-saw. 63 00:02:36,749 --> 00:02:37,716 - Cecil. 64 00:02:37,784 --> 00:02:38,818 - Sea snail. 65 00:02:38,885 --> 00:02:39,952 - Cecil. 66 00:02:40,019 --> 00:02:41,453 - This one talks too much, Bunny. 67 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:44,223 When are you going to get a warlock boyfriend? 68 00:02:44,290 --> 00:02:48,027 - Mom, we've been married for 30 years. 69 00:02:48,094 --> 00:02:49,461 - Well, whatever. 70 00:02:49,528 --> 00:02:52,364 I'm here to see my precious granddaughter. 71 00:02:52,431 --> 00:02:55,467 You're the daughter of a seventh-generation witch, 72 00:02:55,534 --> 00:02:56,302 you know? 73 00:02:56,368 --> 00:02:58,337 - [gasps] I am? 74 00:02:58,404 --> 00:03:00,439 - Now that you're eight years old, 75 00:03:00,506 --> 00:03:05,077 it's time to undergo the family witch trials to test 76 00:03:05,144 --> 00:03:06,678 you for magical powers. 77 00:03:06,745 --> 00:03:07,746 - Oh! Oh! 78 00:03:07,814 --> 00:03:09,181 Oh! 79 00:03:09,248 --> 00:03:11,717 Can you test us for a magic too, Gwanny? 80 00:03:11,784 --> 00:03:16,823 - Oh, I've got a special test for you. 81 00:03:16,889 --> 00:03:18,791 - Huh? - Huh? 82 00:03:18,858 --> 00:03:20,092 [dramatic music] 83 00:03:20,159 --> 00:03:22,661 - Ehh! - Ahh! 84 00:03:22,728 --> 00:03:24,897 [both shouting] 85 00:03:24,964 --> 00:03:25,932 Ooh. 86 00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:27,599 - Mm-mm-mm. 87 00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:29,869 both: Ooh. Mmm-mmm-mmm. 88 00:03:29,936 --> 00:03:32,939 - I don't think I have magical powers yet. 89 00:03:33,005 --> 00:03:34,540 When did you get yours, Mom? 90 00:03:34,606 --> 00:03:38,377 - Well, I never got my powers. 91 00:03:38,444 --> 00:03:44,050 I may not have lived up to all of Mama's expectations, 92 00:03:44,116 --> 00:03:47,253 but the greatest magical spell of all 93 00:03:47,319 --> 00:03:50,322 is keeping this house tidy. 94 00:03:50,389 --> 00:03:51,657 - No, it isn't. 95 00:03:51,723 --> 00:03:53,826 This is. 96 00:03:53,893 --> 00:03:55,594 - [screams] No. 97 00:03:55,661 --> 00:03:57,263 Not my cabinets. 98 00:03:57,329 --> 00:03:59,932 Oh, my poor linoleum. 99 00:03:59,999 --> 00:04:02,902 - Do you really think I'm a witch, Grandma? 100 00:04:02,969 --> 00:04:06,638 - One can only hope. 101 00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:11,443 First, we'll test your ability to cast fire spells. 102 00:04:11,510 --> 00:04:13,812 You'll need a fire wand, naturally. 103 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:14,813 - Wow. 104 00:04:14,881 --> 00:04:16,282 My own wand. 105 00:04:16,348 --> 00:04:19,085 Oh, thank you, Nana. 106 00:04:19,151 --> 00:04:20,686 Can I call your Nana? 107 00:04:20,752 --> 00:04:22,354 - No, no. 108 00:04:22,421 --> 00:04:25,124 A real witch knows how to use her wand 109 00:04:25,191 --> 00:04:27,126 to focus her pyromancy. 110 00:04:27,193 --> 00:04:28,127 Like so. 111 00:04:28,194 --> 00:04:31,230 Ignite! 112 00:04:31,297 --> 00:04:33,199 - Whew. Ooh. 113 00:04:33,265 --> 00:04:36,002 Today's a real scorcher. 114 00:04:36,068 --> 00:04:37,669 - Now it is your turn. 115 00:04:37,736 --> 00:04:41,207 Try the mailbox. 116 00:04:41,273 --> 00:04:43,209 - Ignite. 117 00:04:44,610 --> 00:04:45,844 Uh... 118 00:04:45,912 --> 00:04:47,046 Huh? Ugh. 119 00:04:47,113 --> 00:04:48,080 Ignite! Ignite! 120 00:04:48,147 --> 00:04:49,081 Ignite! 121 00:04:49,148 --> 00:04:52,118 Ah. 122 00:04:52,184 --> 00:04:53,185 Oh. 123 00:04:53,252 --> 00:04:56,755 Oh, I'm not a witch, am I? 124 00:04:56,822 --> 00:05:00,059 - You may need target practice, dear. 125 00:05:00,126 --> 00:05:02,728 You just missed. 126 00:05:02,794 --> 00:05:05,031 - Missed? 127 00:05:05,097 --> 00:05:06,698 - [screams] 128 00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:09,201 - It was an ugly house anyway. 129 00:05:09,268 --> 00:05:12,138 And now your next trial. 130 00:05:12,204 --> 00:05:13,472 Trial number two. 131 00:05:13,539 --> 00:05:16,943 You will brew a transformation potion. 132 00:05:17,009 --> 00:05:19,178 Let me show you how it works. 133 00:05:19,245 --> 00:05:20,746 [whistles] 134 00:05:20,812 --> 00:05:22,448 - [growling] 135 00:05:22,514 --> 00:05:24,616 - [screaming] 136 00:05:24,683 --> 00:05:25,985 Ow. 137 00:05:26,052 --> 00:05:27,853 - Down the hatch, See-saw. 138 00:05:27,920 --> 00:05:30,722 - [gulping] 139 00:05:30,789 --> 00:05:33,359 Pthew! 140 00:05:33,425 --> 00:05:36,295 Oh, peachy keen. 141 00:05:36,362 --> 00:05:37,463 - Eww. 142 00:05:37,529 --> 00:05:39,031 - Now you try. 143 00:05:39,098 --> 00:05:41,300 - [whimpering] 144 00:05:41,367 --> 00:05:44,136 [panting] 145 00:05:44,203 --> 00:05:45,737 - OK. 146 00:05:45,804 --> 00:05:46,973 Eye of newt. 147 00:05:47,039 --> 00:05:48,774 Pimple of newt. 148 00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:50,709 Twist of lemon. 149 00:05:52,411 --> 00:05:53,745 And a-- huh? 150 00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:54,580 My potion. 151 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:57,616 What's happening to my-- 152 00:05:57,683 --> 00:05:58,784 Patrick. 153 00:05:58,850 --> 00:06:01,753 - [belches] You should be proud, sis. 154 00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:05,224 That was the best tub soup I've ever had. 155 00:06:05,291 --> 00:06:06,358 - Do you feel anything? 156 00:06:06,425 --> 00:06:07,393 - Hmm. 157 00:06:07,459 --> 00:06:10,329 I feel-- I feel-- 158 00:06:10,396 --> 00:06:12,331 - Yes? 159 00:06:12,398 --> 00:06:14,633 - Hungry. 160 00:06:14,700 --> 00:06:17,036 Hey, tiny dessert soup. 161 00:06:17,103 --> 00:06:18,104 Ooh. 162 00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:21,207 [inhales] - Huh? 163 00:06:21,273 --> 00:06:23,009 - Ahh. 164 00:06:23,075 --> 00:06:26,012 [both cackling] 165 00:06:26,078 --> 00:06:27,546 Delicious. 166 00:06:27,613 --> 00:06:29,215 [both cackling] 167 00:06:29,281 --> 00:06:30,282 - [cackling] 168 00:06:30,349 --> 00:06:32,151 - Uh, will he be OK? 169 00:06:32,218 --> 00:06:34,686 - Was he ever OK? 170 00:06:34,753 --> 00:06:37,423 - Make way, GrandPat's gotta go. 171 00:06:37,489 --> 00:06:40,226 What the-- 172 00:06:40,292 --> 00:06:44,130 [all cackling] 173 00:06:44,196 --> 00:06:46,932 Witchcraft is afoot. 174 00:06:46,999 --> 00:06:48,534 Snap out of it, boy. 175 00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:50,169 - Oh, thanks, GrandPat. 176 00:06:50,236 --> 00:06:51,203 - No time. 177 00:06:51,270 --> 00:06:52,404 We got a witch to catch. 178 00:06:52,471 --> 00:06:54,906 [both cackling] 179 00:06:56,175 --> 00:06:57,909 Wait here, Sonny. 180 00:06:57,976 --> 00:06:59,445 I gotta change. 181 00:06:59,511 --> 00:07:01,747 - Ohh. Ooh. 182 00:07:01,813 --> 00:07:03,715 - [grunting] - [gasps] 183 00:07:03,782 --> 00:07:08,587 - Witchfindin' GrandPat ready for a witch findin'. 184 00:07:08,654 --> 00:07:11,990 - [laughs] You look old-timey. 185 00:07:12,058 --> 00:07:13,792 - I am old-timey. 186 00:07:13,859 --> 00:07:18,364 And witches like Agnes are evil and must be vanquished 187 00:07:18,430 --> 00:07:21,367 from the face of the Earth. 188 00:07:21,433 --> 00:07:24,070 - Grandma Agnes is a witch? 189 00:07:26,438 --> 00:07:28,340 - The broom test is next. 190 00:07:28,407 --> 00:07:31,210 All witches can fly on a broom. 191 00:07:31,277 --> 00:07:32,844 - I don't know, Nana. 192 00:07:32,911 --> 00:07:35,314 Shouldn't I start small, like, you know, with a feather 193 00:07:35,381 --> 00:07:37,183 duster or something? 194 00:07:37,249 --> 00:07:39,518 - I see you there, witch. 195 00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:41,487 [screams] - Ohh. 196 00:07:41,553 --> 00:07:43,689 Nana, quick, save my granddad. 197 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:47,025 - I'd rather not, but OK. 198 00:07:47,093 --> 00:07:49,428 - [screams] Oh. 199 00:07:49,495 --> 00:07:51,430 Whoa. 200 00:07:51,497 --> 00:07:56,735 You'll regret saving me when I'm through with you, witch. 201 00:07:56,802 --> 00:07:57,736 - No. 202 00:07:57,803 --> 00:07:59,205 You will. 203 00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:01,340 - [screams] 204 00:08:01,407 --> 00:08:04,410 Ow! Oh! Ah! 205 00:08:04,476 --> 00:08:06,178 Doh! 206 00:08:06,245 --> 00:08:08,080 - Thanks, gov'na. 207 00:08:08,147 --> 00:08:12,618 - Nana, that wasn't magical; it was just mean. 208 00:08:12,684 --> 00:08:15,654 - Honey, when a man tries to burn you at the stake, 209 00:08:15,721 --> 00:08:18,490 it's OK to be mean. 210 00:08:18,557 --> 00:08:20,826 - [grunting] 211 00:08:20,892 --> 00:08:21,827 - Oh. 212 00:08:21,893 --> 00:08:22,961 You win. 213 00:08:23,028 --> 00:08:25,597 Now you get to spill food on me. 214 00:08:25,664 --> 00:08:27,366 - Oh, Patrick. 215 00:08:27,433 --> 00:08:28,800 - Hiya, GrandPat. 216 00:08:28,867 --> 00:08:29,835 Wow. 217 00:08:29,901 --> 00:08:30,636 You got creamed. 218 00:08:30,702 --> 00:08:31,670 - Dang it, boy. 219 00:08:31,737 --> 00:08:33,605 Agnes is too powerful. 220 00:08:33,672 --> 00:08:36,908 We gotta fight magic-- ahh!. 221 00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:38,477 With magic. 222 00:08:40,246 --> 00:08:43,782 [energetic music] 223 00:08:43,849 --> 00:08:46,785 - Darling, do have an outlet where I can charge my wand? 224 00:08:46,852 --> 00:08:51,390 I could never find one that works with Klopnadian plugs. 225 00:08:51,457 --> 00:08:53,024 - Ladies and gentlemen, 226 00:08:53,091 --> 00:08:57,429 introducing the magician on a mission, 227 00:08:57,496 --> 00:09:00,266 GrandPat the Magnificent. 228 00:09:00,332 --> 00:09:02,234 [dramatic music] 229 00:09:02,301 --> 00:09:04,570 - Oh! 230 00:09:04,636 --> 00:09:06,372 Are you ready for some-- 231 00:09:06,438 --> 00:09:09,107 [coughs] magic? 232 00:09:09,175 --> 00:09:10,142 - Huh. 233 00:09:10,209 --> 00:09:12,611 That is not real magic. 234 00:09:13,679 --> 00:09:14,946 - Oh, yeah? 235 00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:18,850 Then what's this quarter doing behind your ear? 236 00:09:18,917 --> 00:09:19,718 Ooh. 237 00:09:19,785 --> 00:09:20,986 - How did you do that? 238 00:09:21,052 --> 00:09:22,020 - Gotcha. 239 00:09:22,087 --> 00:09:23,054 - Yeah. 240 00:09:23,121 --> 00:09:25,123 Presto, change-o, bye-bye, witcho. 241 00:09:25,191 --> 00:09:27,659 [laughs] 242 00:09:27,726 --> 00:09:32,964 And that is how you lose a witch. 243 00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:34,400 - GrandPat. 244 00:09:34,466 --> 00:09:36,335 - Oh, ah, oh, my. 245 00:09:36,402 --> 00:09:38,770 This simply won't do. 246 00:09:38,837 --> 00:09:41,273 - [coughs] Oh, yeah? 247 00:09:41,340 --> 00:09:44,676 Well, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat. 248 00:09:44,743 --> 00:09:47,879 Abra-cabarbara. 249 00:09:47,946 --> 00:09:50,182 - [roars] 250 00:09:50,249 --> 00:09:52,150 - Ugh. 251 00:09:52,218 --> 00:09:54,420 - Ohh! 252 00:09:54,486 --> 00:09:56,422 - Enough. 253 00:09:56,488 --> 00:09:58,424 - Huh? 254 00:09:58,490 --> 00:10:00,091 [mystical music] 255 00:10:00,158 --> 00:10:05,531 - Oh my precious granddaughter does have powers. 256 00:10:05,597 --> 00:10:06,898 - [grunts] - Huh? 257 00:10:06,965 --> 00:10:08,934 - Grandma, it was nice to meet you, 258 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:12,604 but it's time for you to go. 259 00:10:12,671 --> 00:10:14,139 - Oh, oh. 260 00:10:14,206 --> 00:10:19,878 I'll send you a check for $5 on your birthday. 261 00:10:23,048 --> 00:10:24,783 Ah, family. 262 00:10:24,850 --> 00:10:28,287 Can't live with them, can't burn them at the stake. 263 00:10:28,354 --> 00:10:30,589 [laughs] 264 00:10:30,656 --> 00:10:35,126 - Oh, Squidina's magical after all? 265 00:10:35,193 --> 00:10:39,265 - We have another witch in the family. 266 00:10:39,331 --> 00:10:40,699 - A witch? 267 00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:43,168 - Nah, It's just movie magic. 268 00:10:43,235 --> 00:10:47,205 Like this. 269 00:10:47,273 --> 00:10:49,941 - Ooh. [laughs] 270 00:10:50,008 --> 00:10:51,209 - Ooh. 271 00:10:51,277 --> 00:10:52,878 - Gosh. 272 00:10:52,944 --> 00:10:55,781 It's amazing what you can do with computers these days. 273 00:10:55,847 --> 00:10:58,183 - Yeah, being a witch might be cool and all, 274 00:10:58,250 --> 00:11:02,288 but I realized I'm much happier producing our television show, 275 00:11:02,354 --> 00:11:03,589 like a normal kid. 276 00:11:03,655 --> 00:11:04,923 - Aw. 277 00:11:04,990 --> 00:11:07,493 You learned that lesson in record time. 278 00:11:07,559 --> 00:11:08,627 Oh. 279 00:11:08,694 --> 00:11:10,562 And it's a full moon tonight. 280 00:11:10,629 --> 00:11:13,465 - I may not be much of a witch... 281 00:11:13,532 --> 00:11:16,902 [grunting] 282 00:11:16,968 --> 00:11:19,371 But I'm one heck of a werewolf. 283 00:11:19,438 --> 00:11:20,606 [laughs] 284 00:11:23,842 --> 00:11:27,279 [seals barking rhythmically] 285 00:11:28,947 --> 00:11:31,182 - Oh, make it stop. 286 00:11:31,249 --> 00:11:32,484 [indistinct chatter] 287 00:11:32,551 --> 00:11:35,253 - It sounds like angels singing. 288 00:11:35,321 --> 00:11:37,523 [seals barking rhythmically] 289 00:11:37,589 --> 00:11:40,492 - [groans] 290 00:11:40,559 --> 00:11:44,062 What in the honk is going on? 291 00:11:44,129 --> 00:11:46,164 - I don't know if this was the best act 292 00:11:46,231 --> 00:11:49,267 for our new late-night segment. 293 00:11:49,335 --> 00:11:51,337 - Patrick Star! 294 00:11:51,403 --> 00:11:55,674 [seals barking rhythmically] 295 00:11:55,741 --> 00:11:58,009 You are a menace. 296 00:11:58,076 --> 00:12:03,782 I'm trying to sleep, and I've had it with your stupid show. 297 00:12:03,849 --> 00:12:04,750 - Oh, wait. - Who's that? 298 00:12:04,816 --> 00:12:06,385 That's a new character. 299 00:12:06,452 --> 00:12:11,289 - This ain't no talk show; it's a unnatural disaster. 300 00:12:11,357 --> 00:12:14,426 [laughter] 301 00:12:14,493 --> 00:12:18,697 I am closing the curtains on this disgraceful act. 302 00:12:18,764 --> 00:12:22,534 [grunting, panting] 303 00:12:22,601 --> 00:12:26,304 Oh, she's hilarious. 304 00:12:26,372 --> 00:12:27,706 - Stop laughing. 305 00:12:27,773 --> 00:12:29,140 You're encouraging him. 306 00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:30,976 [all cheering] 307 00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:33,512 Why are you even watching this drivel? 308 00:12:33,579 --> 00:12:35,614 You people are sick. 309 00:12:35,681 --> 00:12:38,984 - Ooh. - She has a catchphrase. 310 00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:41,286 - That's a catchy catchphrase. 311 00:12:41,353 --> 00:12:42,253 - You people-- 312 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:44,823 - Are sick. 313 00:12:44,890 --> 00:12:46,825 - I don't have time for this. 314 00:12:46,892 --> 00:12:49,327 I am out of here. 315 00:12:49,395 --> 00:12:51,196 [grunts] 316 00:12:51,262 --> 00:12:52,230 [laughter] 317 00:12:52,297 --> 00:12:54,165 Huh? What the? 318 00:12:54,232 --> 00:12:55,767 [growls] 319 00:12:55,834 --> 00:12:57,268 Darn mayo. 320 00:12:57,335 --> 00:12:58,704 - Encore. 321 00:12:58,770 --> 00:13:03,308 En-- well, nothing worth watching now that she's gone. 322 00:13:03,375 --> 00:13:04,510 - Yeah. 323 00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:06,011 - The thrill is gone. 324 00:13:06,077 --> 00:13:07,579 - What just happened? 325 00:13:07,646 --> 00:13:12,150 - I think we just lost our audience. 326 00:13:12,217 --> 00:13:13,318 - Hey, pal. 327 00:13:13,385 --> 00:13:15,353 you're still going to pay us, right? 328 00:13:15,421 --> 00:13:17,355 [upbeat music] 329 00:13:17,423 --> 00:13:21,393 - [snoring] 330 00:13:21,460 --> 00:13:23,662 [alarm rings] Ahh! 331 00:13:23,729 --> 00:13:28,434 Ahh, another beautiful morning... 332 00:13:28,500 --> 00:13:31,302 for morons and maniacs. 333 00:13:31,369 --> 00:13:33,772 [grumbling] 334 00:13:33,839 --> 00:13:37,008 Ahh, at last. 335 00:13:37,075 --> 00:13:39,945 - Hey, she's here. She's here. - [grunting] 336 00:13:40,011 --> 00:13:41,379 Back it up. Get back. 337 00:13:41,447 --> 00:13:43,582 - Oh, she's back. 338 00:13:43,649 --> 00:13:47,318 - I love you, Granny Tentacles. 339 00:13:47,385 --> 00:13:49,988 I'm a sicko. 340 00:13:50,055 --> 00:13:51,990 - It's too early for this. 341 00:13:52,057 --> 00:13:53,692 Get off of my lawn. 342 00:13:53,759 --> 00:13:54,760 You people-- 343 00:13:54,826 --> 00:13:56,394 all: Are sick. 344 00:13:56,462 --> 00:13:58,363 - Don't you interrupt me. 345 00:13:58,430 --> 00:13:59,498 You people-- 346 00:13:59,565 --> 00:14:01,467 all: Are sick. 347 00:14:01,533 --> 00:14:03,569 - You people are sick. 348 00:14:03,635 --> 00:14:06,071 The nerve of these people. 349 00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:07,473 Ahh. 350 00:14:07,539 --> 00:14:12,243 All right, now, let's see what's in the paper today, 351 00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:14,513 besides lies. 352 00:14:14,580 --> 00:14:15,647 [all giggling] 353 00:14:15,714 --> 00:14:16,682 - Huh? 354 00:14:16,748 --> 00:14:20,118 Who's there? 355 00:14:20,185 --> 00:14:21,286 Hmm. 356 00:14:21,352 --> 00:14:23,889 Eh, maybe my hearing aid's acting up. 357 00:14:25,657 --> 00:14:27,726 I don't know why I bother. 358 00:14:27,793 --> 00:14:31,797 It's not like there's anyone worth listening to anyway. 359 00:14:31,863 --> 00:14:33,298 [all giggling] 360 00:14:33,364 --> 00:14:34,332 - Huh? 361 00:14:34,399 --> 00:14:35,767 Who's there? 362 00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:37,669 Ahh! 363 00:14:37,736 --> 00:14:39,738 Oh. Phew. 364 00:14:39,805 --> 00:14:42,908 It's just some of Squidward's art. 365 00:14:42,974 --> 00:14:46,277 If that's what you want to call it. 366 00:14:47,245 --> 00:14:48,413 all: Whoo! 367 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:50,682 - We want more show. 368 00:14:50,749 --> 00:14:52,984 - Oh, you want a show? 369 00:14:53,051 --> 00:14:58,490 How about I show you the way out? 370 00:14:58,557 --> 00:15:01,593 This is getting ridiculous. 371 00:15:01,660 --> 00:15:07,065 [babbling indistinctly] 372 00:15:07,132 --> 00:15:08,634 Huh? 373 00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:12,403 - Washing her face is a metaphor for starting over. 374 00:15:12,470 --> 00:15:13,572 - Ahh! 375 00:15:13,639 --> 00:15:15,807 - Also, it's blunt and derivative. 376 00:15:15,874 --> 00:15:18,076 - Who are you calling derivative? 377 00:15:18,143 --> 00:15:21,212 Also, who are you people? 378 00:15:21,279 --> 00:15:22,981 Ahh! 379 00:15:23,048 --> 00:15:25,851 - Her character is so hard to read. 380 00:15:25,917 --> 00:15:28,286 I really like that. 381 00:15:28,353 --> 00:15:30,822 - Phew. 382 00:15:30,889 --> 00:15:33,892 This Granny Tentacles merch is awesome. 383 00:15:33,959 --> 00:15:35,527 How much for these dentures? 384 00:15:37,295 --> 00:15:40,766 - [screams] 385 00:15:40,832 --> 00:15:43,168 [together] Ohh! Ohh! 386 00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:46,504 - Sorry, but I've got to run... over these idiots. 387 00:15:46,572 --> 00:15:48,273 - I love you. Marry me. 388 00:15:48,339 --> 00:15:51,142 [tries squealing] 389 00:15:51,209 --> 00:15:53,979 - This show is so interactive. 390 00:15:54,045 --> 00:15:55,981 - Whew. Sheesh. 391 00:15:56,047 --> 00:16:00,518 I finally lost those sickos. 392 00:16:00,586 --> 00:16:04,355 Maybe a walk in the park would relax me. 393 00:16:04,422 --> 00:16:05,423 Yeah. 394 00:16:05,490 --> 00:16:10,428 A nice relaxing walk. 395 00:16:10,495 --> 00:16:14,532 - Oh, I love the park. 396 00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,302 [metal crunching] 397 00:16:17,368 --> 00:16:20,772 Nice parking. 398 00:16:20,839 --> 00:16:25,276 - Oh, well, that's enough walking for this old carcass. 399 00:16:25,343 --> 00:16:29,748 All right, my little clams, eat up. 400 00:16:29,815 --> 00:16:31,349 Ahh. 401 00:16:31,416 --> 00:16:32,483 Huh? 402 00:16:32,550 --> 00:16:35,220 Do not feed the clams. 403 00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:36,421 Hmph. 404 00:16:36,487 --> 00:16:39,024 More like, do not tell me what to do. 405 00:16:39,090 --> 00:16:40,926 There, that's better. 406 00:16:40,992 --> 00:16:43,294 - Oh, no she didn't. 407 00:16:43,361 --> 00:16:44,930 - Huh? 408 00:16:44,996 --> 00:16:46,297 - She's a rebel. 409 00:16:46,364 --> 00:16:49,567 - Don't you people have lives? 410 00:16:49,635 --> 00:16:50,902 - Oh my gosh. 411 00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:52,337 Is that her new catchphrase? 412 00:16:52,403 --> 00:16:55,106 - That's even better than her old one. 413 00:16:55,173 --> 00:16:57,375 I have no life. 414 00:16:57,442 --> 00:16:58,710 [laughs] 415 00:16:58,777 --> 00:17:00,578 - Oh, what am I saying? 416 00:17:00,646 --> 00:17:02,513 Obviously, you people-- 417 00:17:02,580 --> 00:17:04,783 all: Don't have lives. 418 00:17:04,850 --> 00:17:07,786 Whoo-hoo. 419 00:17:07,853 --> 00:17:09,187 - Ugh. 420 00:17:09,254 --> 00:17:12,958 You people need a hobby that isn't me. 421 00:17:13,024 --> 00:17:16,795 [panting] 422 00:17:16,862 --> 00:17:18,063 Ahh. 423 00:17:18,129 --> 00:17:20,799 I really lost them this time. 424 00:17:20,866 --> 00:17:21,933 - Pardon me, ma'am. 425 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,069 Could I have your signature? 426 00:17:24,135 --> 00:17:25,103 - What for? 427 00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:27,873 Hey, wait a minute. 428 00:17:27,939 --> 00:17:29,675 Aren't you the bus driver? 429 00:17:34,479 --> 00:17:35,847 - Yeah. 430 00:17:35,914 --> 00:17:38,616 But more importantly, I'm the president of the Granny 431 00:17:38,684 --> 00:17:40,218 Tentacles fan club. 432 00:17:40,285 --> 00:17:43,188 We call ourselves Fantacles. 433 00:17:43,254 --> 00:17:44,723 - What are you talking about? 434 00:17:44,790 --> 00:17:46,557 What fan club? 435 00:17:46,624 --> 00:17:47,558 - That one. 436 00:17:47,625 --> 00:17:49,995 - Oh, no. 437 00:17:50,061 --> 00:17:51,196 - Oh. 438 00:17:51,262 --> 00:17:53,965 What a dramatic third act twist. 439 00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:57,402 - Oh, this is obviously still act two. 440 00:17:57,468 --> 00:17:59,971 - [screams] 441 00:18:00,038 --> 00:18:03,508 - Granny Tentacles hurled me. 442 00:18:03,574 --> 00:18:07,713 - I hope you don't suffer from separation anxiety. 443 00:18:07,779 --> 00:18:10,749 [laughs] 444 00:18:10,816 --> 00:18:12,083 Whew. 445 00:18:12,150 --> 00:18:13,719 all: Oh! Yeah! 446 00:18:13,785 --> 00:18:15,253 - Huh? 447 00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:17,756 Ahh! 448 00:18:17,823 --> 00:18:19,725 - There she goes. - Get her. 449 00:18:19,791 --> 00:18:21,993 - This way. 450 00:18:22,060 --> 00:18:23,028 - [gasps] 451 00:18:23,094 --> 00:18:24,863 [indistinct chatter] 452 00:18:24,930 --> 00:18:27,032 - Oh, I can't hear a thing. 453 00:18:27,098 --> 00:18:28,700 Where's the volume? 454 00:18:33,739 --> 00:18:36,241 - Dry eyes blurring your vision? 455 00:18:36,307 --> 00:18:38,844 Try Focal Flush. 456 00:18:39,477 --> 00:18:41,980 Side effects include dry eyes, big eye, 457 00:18:42,047 --> 00:18:43,782 small eye, human eyes. 458 00:18:43,849 --> 00:18:45,183 - Ahh! 459 00:18:45,250 --> 00:18:46,718 - I still can't hear. 460 00:18:48,253 --> 00:18:49,220 [loud explosion] 461 00:18:49,287 --> 00:18:52,924 Oh, OK, I did hear that. 462 00:18:52,991 --> 00:18:53,925 - Phew. 463 00:18:53,992 --> 00:18:55,393 all: Granny! 464 00:18:55,460 --> 00:18:56,294 - Eh? 465 00:18:56,361 --> 00:18:59,597 all: Say we have no lives. 466 00:19:00,766 --> 00:19:02,700 - Phew. 467 00:19:02,768 --> 00:19:06,037 Stay away from me. Stay away from me. 468 00:19:07,705 --> 00:19:10,441 Well, they are committed. 469 00:19:10,508 --> 00:19:12,310 [screams] I can't look. 470 00:19:12,377 --> 00:19:14,145 I can't look. I can't look. 471 00:19:16,047 --> 00:19:19,617 - Oops, I turned on the subtitles. 472 00:19:19,985 --> 00:19:21,319 [together] Turn them back on. 473 00:19:21,386 --> 00:19:23,288 Ahh! 474 00:19:24,289 --> 00:19:25,423 - I made it. 475 00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:26,557 I'm alive. 476 00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:27,826 Ahh! 477 00:19:27,893 --> 00:19:30,095 - Thank you. - Yeah, keep it up, Granny! 478 00:19:30,161 --> 00:19:32,764 - Oh, come on. 479 00:19:32,831 --> 00:19:34,766 - We love you. 480 00:19:34,833 --> 00:19:38,436 [tires squealing] 481 00:19:38,503 --> 00:19:39,304 - Ahh! 482 00:19:39,370 --> 00:19:41,506 - Granny, take my hand. 483 00:19:41,572 --> 00:19:43,174 - Where'd she go? 484 00:19:43,241 --> 00:19:44,843 - Huh? Oh, thank you. 485 00:19:44,910 --> 00:19:45,877 Thank you. 486 00:19:45,944 --> 00:19:47,012 Thank you so much. 487 00:19:47,078 --> 00:19:48,646 You saved me. 488 00:19:48,713 --> 00:19:50,481 - My pleasure. 489 00:19:50,548 --> 00:19:51,649 - Yeah. 490 00:19:51,716 --> 00:19:53,885 We're giving you the "Star" treatment. 491 00:19:53,952 --> 00:19:57,856 - Granny, you've got the number one spin-off on our street. 492 00:19:57,923 --> 00:19:59,157 - Spin who? 493 00:19:59,224 --> 00:20:00,225 - Yeah. 494 00:20:00,291 --> 00:20:01,860 We are you're new producers. 495 00:20:01,927 --> 00:20:03,261 But don't worry. 496 00:20:03,328 --> 00:20:06,264 We're only taking 80% of the profits. 497 00:20:06,331 --> 00:20:07,866 - How about you only take me home? 498 00:20:07,933 --> 00:20:09,467 - We are. 499 00:20:09,534 --> 00:20:11,636 It's the next location on our production schedule. 500 00:20:11,702 --> 00:20:12,670 - Huh? 501 00:20:12,737 --> 00:20:13,805 - You're on. 502 00:20:13,872 --> 00:20:15,673 - [screams] 503 00:20:15,740 --> 00:20:17,242 [upbeat music] 504 00:20:17,308 --> 00:20:19,610 [indistinct chatter] 505 00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:21,579 - She's back. 506 00:20:21,646 --> 00:20:25,416 - Well, if you can't beat them, knock 'em dead. 507 00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,987 For reasons that I'll never know, 508 00:20:29,054 --> 00:20:31,156 you wanted me to be a show. 509 00:20:31,222 --> 00:20:33,358 And so, let's go! 510 00:20:33,424 --> 00:20:37,295 * Just wait'll you see what you have in store * 511 00:20:37,362 --> 00:20:40,431 * With the "Granny Tentacles Show" * 512 00:20:40,498 --> 00:20:43,268 * Special guests from all over the sea * 513 00:20:43,334 --> 00:20:44,502 * The best of the best * 514 00:20:44,569 --> 00:20:45,837 * Yeah, seriously * 515 00:20:45,904 --> 00:20:47,705 * You're gonna laugh * 516 00:20:47,772 --> 00:20:49,307 - Is this thing on? 517 00:20:49,374 --> 00:20:51,042 - * You're going to scream * 518 00:20:51,109 --> 00:20:54,612 * You're going to swear somehow a technicolor dream * 519 00:20:54,679 --> 00:20:57,715 * Smacked you in the head with razzle-dazzle * 520 00:20:57,782 --> 00:21:00,418 * Leaving you wowed and maybe even frazzled * 521 00:21:00,485 --> 00:21:03,188 * So all right, starting tonight * 522 00:21:03,254 --> 00:21:06,724 * You'll get the show you wanted, much to your delight * 523 00:21:06,791 --> 00:21:13,831 * The "Granny Tentacles Show" * 524 00:21:16,301 --> 00:21:18,069 [pants] 525 00:21:18,136 --> 00:21:21,306 [all snoring] 526 00:21:24,809 --> 00:21:28,013 But I gave them what they wanted. 527 00:21:28,079 --> 00:21:30,982 - Hey, everyone, forget this show. 528 00:21:31,049 --> 00:21:35,686 There's a guy down the street painting a fence. 529 00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:37,388 [all gasping] 530 00:21:37,455 --> 00:21:39,257 [indistinct chatter] 531 00:21:39,324 --> 00:21:41,326 - [sighs] 532 00:21:41,392 --> 00:21:42,994 - Sorry, Gramps. 533 00:21:43,061 --> 00:21:47,899 That's showbiz. 534 00:21:47,966 --> 00:21:51,702 [static droning] 535 00:21:51,769 --> 00:21:52,803 [upbeat music] 536 00:21:52,870 --> 00:21:56,074 all: Hooray! Great job! 537 00:21:56,141 --> 00:21:57,542 Paint that fence! 538 00:21:57,608 --> 00:22:00,811 - Eh, this show's pretty good... 539 00:22:00,878 --> 00:22:02,247 for me to hate watch. 540 00:22:02,313 --> 00:22:05,383 * * 541 00:22:05,433 --> 00:22:09,983 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0